Part 3 MY AUTHENTIC JOURNEY: HOW I RELEASED THE PAIN
- January 21, 2021
- Aishah Adams
This is Aishah again and I am back with Part 3 of my series. How have you been doing?
I understand some past experience might have come up since you started reading this series and that is fine. What do you plan to do with those emotions?
Like you, I used to read people’s stories back then and wonder if I could ever be brave enough to share mine and get people motivated the way I drew strength from those other amazing people I read about.
Reminds me of the book launch of my sister and friend Dr Muti’ah Badruddeen titled Umm Abdillaah.I was working with an NGO at that time and I was the anchor for the event. There was this wonderful sister who came to share her story of strength and I had tears streaming down my face the whole time. I struggled to get through that book launch but when I got back home, I was a complete mess.
It was as if her story finally forced the vault of emotions I had stored up to open and I cried for all the losses I had suffered and not acknowledged because I believed I had to be strong for the people around me.
I cried for the pregnancy I lost in my 2nd trimester and couldn’t grief for because I felt my family would be distraught. I cried for the weight I had carried for so long. I cried for the days that I felt put down by people because they had children and they thought me less because I had nothing to show. I also cried for the divorce that came to put a cap to all the other previous losses and I felt used. Oh God, I did. Alhamdulilaah, my self worth game is tight now 😎😊
Following the divorce, people who I had never said a word to before suddenly became authorities on who Aishah was. People who had benefitted from my kindness before became too busy as now there was fear of me stealing their husband. 🤣 Infact, I got some stinkers to that effect. And on those days, I reminded myself of the bright light at the end of the tunnel and focusing on that light gave me the strength to push through the heavy cloud that seemed to almost choke as I made my way towards the light with faith and hope.
I had to find my way through all of this to stay stable and rebuild.
I decided right there and then that I was going to become an inspiration for someone going through a similar fate some day. I decided I was going to get so busy being productive and amazing that there would be no room for self pity.
Fast forward almost 14 years later, I have had about 9 miscarriages, divorces, series of health and financial crisis amongst others under my belt and still I Rise…
I am now doing the things that were once dreams and pushing on as verily there are still lots of boxes to tick. I run Siddiqah, an NGO that has touched the lives of over 120,000 people and still I Rise. I also run The Support Lounge, a hub that is passionate about supporting people in a safe space to release pain to embrace the life of their dreams, and still I Rise…
Verily the future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. What are your beliefs about your dreams?
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Hope to see you live your best life
The Mind Doctor 💛